Have you ever faced an uncomfortable situation and experienced an immediate resistance to it? Swirling thoughts, high energy and a fight or flight reaction?

I’m sure many of us have. 

Realistically, though, who has ever had things work out the way they wanted to all of the time? No one…yet we still hope. I know that I do. My mind will lock onto what I want vs what is. And that’s where the turmoil sets in… 

Just because something isn’t desirable doesn’t mean that we can’t deal with it. I make this distinction because clarity of thought and emotion becomes challenging when we’re in fight flight mode. Suddenly, a situation can become overwhelming and throw us into panic mode.

Preference vs Ability 

…read that again…

Preference vs Ability 

Just because we don’t want to deal with something doesn’t mean that we can’t or won’t deal with it. This awareness can translate into a degree of empowerment and build in a much needed buffer amidst the swirl of emotions.

Ask yourself – is my reaction to this situation more about my preference or my ability/skills to manage it? Maybe it’s a bit of both. That’s ok too. Once you (I) have a clearer sense of what’s going on, it’s easier to plan next steps.

Speaking for myself, if I have confidence that I can handle a situation (alone or with help), I am more able to hear the voice that says “but I don’t want to” without the associated strong emotion. I can be kind to myself and say “ok, you don’t want to…” knowing that I can and will manage what is right in front of me. 

I invite you to try this with a situation you’re facing/resisting. Preference or ability?