We all have fears. We…ALL…have fears. 

Whether we acknowledge them or not is another story…

I developed a truly terrible fear of flying in my mid thirties. It’s sort of a strange thing because I had been traveling by plane since childhood. My hypothesis is that it was somehow connected to becoming a (single) mother and my fear of leaving my son. I’m not entirely sure that’s it but it’s highly likely.

What made this particularly rough is that my job, at that time, involved traveling from California to different locations in Latin America. That’s a LONG plane ride. Several times a year.

Someone recently asked me if I knew anyone who had panic attacks. Uh, yes, yes I do…ME. Every time a trip approached my anxiety would escalate and, on trip day, it would morph into a full blown panic attack. Heart racing, sweat that turned to chills, shallow breathing, foggy thinking, catastrophic thoughts…and the list goes on. It was a strangely isolating experience, as if I was the only one with this experience. And that made it scarier…

It was incredibly hard work to find ways to alleviate the panic. Journaling, music, watching a movie, holding my boss’s hand all the way to our destination (bless her bless her bless her), therapy and finally…a big romance novel and a bag of M&Ms (sounds silly but this combo was the winner). Flying, ultimately, became tolerable which was a blessed relief.

So, why am I telling you this? 

Find what works for YOU. But, first, acknowledge the fear and honor it. It means something. It’s trying to tell you something. And…be kind to yourself.  No positive change can come by berating yourself for feeling the way that you do. 

And remember…we ALL have fears. 

(photo credit: freepik)